Ringing the Doorbell with Your Elbow

A friend was giving directions to his new home.

He explained the area, the building, the floor, and the flat number.

Finally, he said: “When you reach, ring the doorbell with your elbow.”

The visitor was puzzled.

He followed all the instructions carefully—except this one.

So he asked, “Why with my elbow?”

The reply was simple and profound:

“Because it’s your first visit. I know you won’t be coming empty-handed. Your hands will be full.”

Learning Something New Takes Effort

This small anecdote carries a big lesson.

Whenever we try something for the first time.

Whether it’s moving to a new city, starting a new job, learning a language, or building a skill—our “hands” are always full.

We don’t walk in empty.

We carry along:

• The weight of our past habits

• The baggage of our comfort zones

• The effort of unlearning what doesn’t serve us

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And because our hands are full, it takes extra effort to even ring the doorbell.

“Every new skill feels awkward at first—not because it’s impossible, but because your hands are full with old ways of doing things.”

The Elbow Principle

Think about it:

• The first time you learned to drive, holding the steering wheel felt unnatural.

• The first time you spoke on stage, even your breath felt like it was in the wrong place.

• The first time you tried coding, cooking, or even playing a sport, every move demanded focus and energy.

That’s the elbow principle: you can’t do it casually, you need conscious effort, a different approach.

“If it feels clumsy in the beginning, you’re probably learning the right way.”

From Awkward to Natural

With practice, what once needed the elbow eventually becomes second nature.

• The driver handles the steering without thinking.

• The speaker adjusts pauses and gestures instinctively.

• The cook adds the right spice without measuring.

But none of them started that way.

They had to arrive at the “new house” of their skill, carrying something in both hands,

awkwardly pressing the doorbell with their elbow.

The Takeaway

Don’t be surprised if the start of your learning journey feels uncomfortable.

It should.

That discomfort is proof you are entering new territory.

So next time you take on a new ability, remind yourself:

“Every new house you walk into will ask you to ring the bell with your elbow.”

And that’s the only way to eventually call it home.

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